Ghost Story

[Varric]

Varric makes a strangled noise that reminds Emma a lot of the sounds Silence makes when she gets her head stuck in things. His mouth opens and a few weird noises don't quite make it out. Finally, he just nods once, eyes averted sharply.

[Marian Hawke]

She takes half a step back. "You don't have to," she says quietly. "It's fine if you don't, I just-- I just wanted to--"

[Varric]

"I'm not-- I don't like emotions. They're messy and irrational and utterly, terrifyingly essential." Varric rubs at his temple, a frown on his lips. "I prefer to prove how-- how I see people, with actions. Words are too easy."

[Marian Hawke]

"I don't... always get what people are saying from actions," Emma admits. "My family said they loved me and I tried really, really hard to see it. Because we were Astean and you're supposed to love people, love your family and love being alive. And I don't... I didn't... Sometimes none of that. So I need words, too."

[Varric]

Varric flinches a little, shifting from foot to foot. "I'll... I'll try," he promises. "To say things, I mean."

[Marian Hawke]

"And I... for what it's worth, I... I really like you a lot, too," she says, rubbing the back of her neck. "I think I might have a crush on you. But I'll try to get over it, I promise."

[Varric]

Varric nods, then laughs softly. "From what I understand, that's not uncommon. One of the typical perils of taking on an apprentice, I'm told."

[Marian Hawke]

Emma flushes a bit. "I can't help it. You're the most wonderful man I've ever met in my entire life. And I used to date."

[Varric]

"Says more about all the previous men than it does about me" Varric mutters, a faintly murderous glint in his eyes. "It's fine. Best avoided as a subject after this but fine. So, uh, if you want to say or ask something about it..."

[Marian Hawke]

"What, about you not...? I don't get it at all, what that's like. I figured I'd pester you later when you're not so... you know."

[Varric]

"I just-- I just don't do that stuff. At all." Not explaining non-sexual BDSM right now (can't, nope, not gonna). "I have a text by Joyous Zevran that I can give you, should explain the idea of it well enough." He coughs. "And about two thousand other questions you might have, plus triple that you didn't realize you did. He's, uh, devoted." Annoying in person, but credit to him for his mastery of the subject.

[Marian Hawke]

"But you still consider yourself a man?"

[Varric]

Varric's head snaps up, eyes wide. "Uh, what?"

[Marian Hawke]

"You know. Men are supposed to be... rapacious." She pronounces the word wrong, but uses it correctly. "You don't want sex, but you don't see yourself as more of a woman? There are people who do that, who were born men but change into women."

[Varric]

"Some men," Varric corrects her with a stunned expression. "Some men are rapacious. Some women are also rapacious. Some intersex or transsexual or neuter and so forth are raspacious. It's not a gender locked quality. And also no, I'm male."