Tales of a Child Eternal [NSFW]

[Helene Dakesh]

Helene takes the bag, eyes latching onto the tome. "Greetings, Herald of Alydra," they say gently, having long since sussed out who this figure is that appears to them in their dreams from time to time. "This one is pleased to be in thine presence once more."

[NPCs]

"Just as this one is pleased to be in thine. How have you fared these last few years?" The Herald of Alydra, the One Who Seeks to Learn Wisely, asks gently, a smile on their lips at Helene having finally been brave enough to voice their suspicion of their identity. 

[Helene Dakesh]

An image of Glory flashes before their eyes, but they push it away. "This one has endured, and found ways to serve. Has this one's service been acceptable to Alydra? Are there concerns about this one's ability to serve?"

[NPCs]

"There are always concerns, some for those that serve and some for that which is served. But that is life," the Ancient One says a bit dismissively. "You have progressed well. Not without trouble or struggles, but you have learned much and, just as importantly, shared what you have learned."

[Helene Dakesh]

Helene nods. "Understood." 

[NPCs]

There's a few moments of serene silence. 'Understood?' What do I do with that? Alright, just... you've reassured them a bit, circle back round. "And how about you as a person? How is Helene, aside from that which is Seeker Helene?"

[Helene Dakesh]

Helene looks away, biting their lower lip. "Is there... a way to take these feelings from me? So that this one does not... long for things this one cannot have?"

[NPCs]

"Feelings are thoughts. Thoughts can be changed, with the right motivation and procedures," the Ancient One replies, though for once the tone is less than neutral, not quite chiding. "However, the mind is a complicated instrument and one cannot change a single key without changing others."

[Helene Dakesh]

Helene flinches. "Understood. This one cannot risk this one's mind. This one's service may be impacted."

[NPCs]

"Among other things," is the gentle reply. "There is more to existence than service. Thou are mortal. It is expected for you to Seek many things beyond simple service."

[Helene Dakesh]

"This one seeks," they say slowly. "But this one does not obtain. This is understood, familiar."

[NPCs]

"You are young yet, not even half way through your lifespan. It is not unusual for mortals to take that long or longer to find a keystone of life. That you have found one so far is to your credit. But that does not mean you should cease your search." Hopefully that's a good blend of reassurance and motivation.

[Helene Dakesh]

"Understood." This is my struggle, my burden: to seek and never to find, to desire and never to have.


Helene walks into the Temple of Alydra, their home, and automatically heads for the library, to browse the stacks. In truth, they don't need the book they're going for; like their tight grip on Varric's hand, this is a comfort thing more than an actual necessity. They know the ritual they seek, have copious notes in their notebook. But they have to ask permission to use the inner sanctum, and they are frightened they may be rejected. So, to the familiar library stacks they go, with Beinn Varric at their side.

[Tethras Clan]

Varric certainly doesn't mind the delay- he's never actually be around for one of Andraste's visits. Andra, sure, nearly the whole Clan was around for that but not the Herald. So spending a bit of time just browsing the stacks was... nice. And of course, time with Helene is no hardship. "Huh? When did Atreius wrote a fourth monologue?" he mutter to himself as he looks around. Not going too far from where Helene is nearly buried by a stack of books.

[Helene Dakesh]

Helene gently strokes the spines of several of the books, sighing with contentment. These books were familiar, the raised lettering just right against their fingertips, the feel of the bindings soothing. Yes, this was the right decision. Very calming.