Under Darkness [AU]

[Isabela]

Isabela nods again as Anders returns, starting to clean up the sick. The wench glances away as she speaks: "I don't think... well, I didn't think any part of Hawke would turn on you guys, but I guess there's always some part of a person that's a traitor, right?"

[Tethras Clan]

Varric frowns a little. "...yes and no," he finally says. "Abomination might have started a fight, but... in a way, she was just trying to defend herself. Defend Hawke I mean. She didn't think the Marian aspect was up to the job, so she was trying to take over. Which is just a... symbolic way of saying that Hawke is trying to find the way she can face reality. The right mindset. But on the other hand, she did attack us." He shrugs. "Everyone has doubts, can be selfless, put themselves first. Lash out at their loved ones from pain or confusion. Or anger, fear or hatred."

"No-one is perfect," Aveline agrees with a nod. "Not even the gods are without flaw or failure."

Zevran smiles faintly, then presses a kiss to Isabela's cheek. I know what you were thinking, ma'bela, and you are no traitor. Not to yourself, not to what you choose to be loyal to. I clearly have a thing for wonderful woman with deeply seated self-doubt. Isabela, Merrill, Hawke... He absently turns his gaze towards Aveline. That's... actually somewhat troubling. No, put that out of mind. Your brain is already overfull.

[Isabela]

Isabela shudders. "It's probably telling that Marian was so fond of all her aspects."

[GamesMaster]

"Yes and no," begins Anders, straightening as he drops the scrubber into the soapy water. "Of course the id would be fond of her aspects -- they're her aspects. That said, she was clearly being charmed by the Abomination aspect, so take that with a grain of salt. Which is likely symbolic for the seductive nature of self-loathing, of course." 

[Tethras Clan]

"Probably a dash of her buried fear of charm spells," Varric supplies. "We have told her a few times Jadan did that so..."

[GamesMaster]

Anders nods. "The situation suggests she's intimately familiar with not only charm but also domination spells, unfortunately."

[Tethras Clan]

Zevran hisses and he turns to rest his head against Isabela's neck. "Perhaps a different choice of words?" Varric snaps.

[GamesMaster]

He frowns, then his eyes widen as he realizes what he said. "Oh! I just meant, she has a lot of experience with them."

[Tethras Clan]

"We know," Aveline says, playing peacemaker. "It was just... we're perhaps a touch sensitive on certain matters right now."

"Yeah. Sorry. Anyway. So that's what happened when I went into the greenhouse. After that memory, there was hugging and comforting and a pep talk and then white light and we're all awake." Varric wipes his mouth on a napkin, then flushes a swig of juice.

[GamesMaster]

"What was in the one you burned?" asks Anders. At Isabela's glare, he adds, "Better to talk it through now and not have to do so again later."

[Tethras Clan]

Varric winces, and swallows. Repeatedly. "Sex. It was... vivid and I wasn't..." he trails off, looking like he was about to vomit again. Zevran winces and quickly jumps up to get another bucket, just in case.

[GamesMaster]

"I understand completely," says Anders rapidly. "Enough said. Any other memories of interest? Perhaps the one with the spotlight?" 

[Tethras Clan]

"Jadan killing her," Varric says after a moment to collect himself. Good, none of them will press for details on that memory. Nobody needs to know. "The light was me. 'Remember this' and all that. Umm. The others I think were just... memories?"

"A bit of normal, happy life with Merrill," Zevran whispers softly.

[GamesMaster]

Anders nods. "Good.... good. So, at this point, we can expect her to sleep for quite some time. So there's no need to -- that is to say, if you need time to collect yourselves, or to be with Merrill, there's plenty of time."

[Tethras Clan]

"At least one of us should be with her at all times," Aveline insists. "Just in case she wakes briefly."

Varric nods. "Hawke... has trouble sleeping in the best of times."