Under Darkness [AU]

[Carver Amell]

"All kinds of perversions of life are possible with magic," he begins, then shakes his head, cutting off. "Sorry. I know. Sorry."

[Tethras Clan]

"You're not wrong," Zevran says with a shrug. "I find undead to be horrid mockeries. Magic is no better or worse than any other gift the gods gave mortals. We can make dirt a thing of wonder or horror with seemingly little effort, much less something as powerful and complicated as magic. Depends on who's using it and what for."

[Carver Amell]

He takes a deep breath. "I don't have a problem with, uh, the whole 'it takes a village' idea, having more people around to raise the children. But that's not what we're talking about."

[Tethras Clan]

"True... but I don't see why adding sex changes all that much," Zevran confesses. "You're already acting as a parent to the twins, already acting like Andy's husband in all but the carnal aspect. Why not complete it?"

[Carver Amell]

"My focus is on them. On the ideal of family, on helping them succeed. If my focus were to shift to him, I might... let him get away with more. I would be betraying my ideals for my own desires, and that's how mortals fall into the worst traps, the worst perversions."

[Tethras Clan]

Zevran considers that for a moment. "Then take it slow. Date. Talk it over with Seli first. And Andy. One at a time and together. This does affect all three of you and all three of you should be on the same page. Ask Clan for help- Merrill adores the twins and is well enough to watch them. And more, watch you both. She'll not hesitate to call you out if she thinks they're being put second. Varric is unnervingly aware and observant. He can supervise as well. It doesn't all have to depend on you."

[Carver Amell]

"Would any of you really stop me if I went off the right path? Or would you just watch me burn everything I cared about down, then chase me off and tell yourselves it was inevitable, it's only Carver, he's never been worth anything anyway?" The words are bitter, and he can't meet Zevran's eyes. 

[Tethras Clan]

"What the actual fuck?"

[Carver Amell]

"I'm sure that's how you all talk behind my back," he adds, softly. "It's only Carver, what does he matter? Marian's the hero. Hells, you all call her Hawke, like she's the only one. Just like Mother -- she never cared that I stayed, only that Marian left." 

[Tethras Clan]

Zevran stares a moment. "Carver, the only thing I've talked about in regards to you that I haven't shared with you in person is... speculation on the love triangle we're just now talking about and how fine your ass is. Which, if you'd like to discuss, I'd be more than happy to do so. We all call your sister Hawke because Varric did and it's simply... how she is to us. I don't think Seli or Isabela even knew her first name until they met you. Actually..." He pauses a moment. "I can't recall if I did for that matter."

[Carver Amell]

"Right. As if Marian hasn't had a good laugh telling you all what a pathetic--" He cuts himself off again. 

[Tethras Clan]

"The only times she talked about you, it was... sad. Wistful. Oh, she'd laugh or agree with Varric or I when we used to remind her about the sword-gut incident," he says with a wince. "But it was... we were scared she would go back to an abusive homelife. And she wanted to please us, so when we... nudged her to agree, she did so, afraid of disappointing. She misses you, Carver. Misses Bethany." He doesn't continue with either of the elder members of that family, rather tellingly. "I... I cannot think of a single unkind word she ever shared about you that was not true- again, sword-gut. That's it. Everything else was, at worst, a tale of a childhood mischief, the bulk of which involved her in a teasing light as well."

[Carver Amell]

He takes a deep breath, lets it out. Another. Finally, he turns back to meet Zevran's eyes, giving a sheepish smile. "Sorry. I'm having a rough day."

[Tethras Clan]

"Having deep seated... ideals or beliefs challenged can be very taxing," Zevran allows with a smile. "I... I still struggle with..." He takes a deep breath of his own. "My own self worth, or lack there of, thanks to my skin and enslavement."

[Carver Amell]

"Your-- what?" He blinks, frowning. "You were a slave?"