Imprints in Stone [AU]

[Carver Amell]

He licks his lips. "Class is all day."

[Varric]

"It is," Varric agress amicably. "But you only went to mornings when you bothered to go at all."

[Carver Amell]

He shifts a bit, sipping his whiskey. Damn. No getting out of this one.

[Varric]

"Don't want to give your side of the story?"

[Carver Amell]

"Would it matter?" His voice is sullen, and he scowls at his glass. "You're just gonna punish me anyway."

[Varric]

"Tch. Carver, Carver, Carver- never assume. Sometimes you have to make a guess, but never assume. In other words, sure, you might guess that I'm going to punish you and try to come up with a plan to mitigate what you think I'll do, but you shouldn't stop planning for other outcomes. Or, even more importantly, stop trying to head off that outcome. Well, if it's bad. If it's good, then keep trying to make sure it happens." Varric smiles a bit. "In this case, you're wrong. I'm disappointed you didn't fulfil your end of a bargain but I want to know why more than I want to feel all smug and powerful by punishing someone I have power over. I'm not your- I'm not Leandra. I want to help."

[Carver Amell]

Carver shifts a little. "They always want to know why. And then I tell them, and then I get punished. Why are you different?"

[Varric]

"Blinding intellect, roguish charm, platinum tongue, razor-sharp wits, amazing chest hair, a multitude of skills and a promise to Marian that I'd look after you both," Varric replies without ever breaking eye contact.

[Carver Amell]

Carver flinches away at the last, looking toward the door as if considering running. Finally, he shrugs, looking back. "I don't... School is awful. I thought there'd be more practical stuff. And... and... I don't know. It's not... I might not be the right sort, I guess. For this. Maybe there's some other way I can help Bethany."

[Varric]

He never was much for studying back in Golden... "Not every person does well in school environments. You do better with hands-on stuff, I noticed. Nothing wrong with that. I did poorly in school as well- lectures just bored me, I could read and study ahead faster than any five teachers could talk." Varric shrugs a little and sips his whisky. "But... I have some idea we can try for that problem. What's this about not being the right sort?"

[Carver Amell]

"I don't know. Nothing. It's stupid."

[Varric]

"Well, lay it out and maybe we can figure it out between the two of us. You'd be amazed how often you can figure out the solution to a problem or question just by explaining it to someone else."

[Carver Amell]

"You always have answers," he says bitterly. He shakes his head, taking a deep breath. "No. Sorry. I. It's just. Maybe I'm not as... I'm just not. Not good enough for Bethany, I mean. She deserves someone, I don't know. Noble. Someone who can control himself."

[Varric]

Love of Alydra, please tell me they're not- ugh. "It's fine," Varric says shortly in response to Carver's outburst. "As for Bethany... I get you. Fuck, you think I don't freeze at least once a day, trying to figure out what fit of madness made me think I'm remotely qualified or prepared to look after another living thing? Wasn't even a decade ago that that the closest relationship I had was with the lady that runs my favorite brewery. Not saying I regret it, but... yeah, I get feeling like you're just an imposter, worrying that one day someone is going to grab your arm and demand that you explain what you're doing, pretending like that."

[Carver Amell]

He shakes his head again. "It's not-- I just. I can't control myself. I'm angry, all the time. I hurt people. It's not right. I mean, I don't mean to hurt people, but I do."