Imprints in Stone [AU]

[Carver Amell]

Carver's quiet for a while. Finally, he sighs. "I... I think she treated you badly because she was already sick. She got worse, but... I think it started when Marian died. Maybe a little before. I think if there's a cure, maybe she'll apologize. Maybe you'll get the apology you deserve. Maybe she'll hug us both and tell us we're better off with Dad, that we did the right thing and she hopes we're happier without her. Maybe she could be in our lives like Malcolm is -- someone who doesn't see us often but wishes us the best and will be there in a pinch if we need her."

[Bethany]

Bethany laughs softly, and there's little mirth or happiness in it. "I love you so much Carver. I wish I was as... kind and forgiving as you."

[Carver Amell]

"I can't not believe in family." He sighs, looking down at his mug, searching for the right words. "That's what I decided, when I went to Raplin's Oak. That's what keeps me myself, and not... I don't even know. Carver Hawke Tethras believes in family, both kin and found. Because, because... because this other person, the person I was scared I'd become, this dog that only exists to protect you, doesn't have a center. Beth's Dog only exists to be thrown away, to save Beth once and die in the process and that's it. But Carver, he always gives family another chance. He trusts that family will still be there if he leaves, and that family will be there when everything hurts. He lets people be family to him, not just an ideal."

[Bethany]

Bethany sobs. Just once, but it's a deep, wrenching sound. "When did you grow up and get so wise?" she asks in a choked whisper. "I'm so damn proud of you."

[Carver Amell]

He scoffs. "I got trained by a tiger," he admits. "That did a lot for me. I.. I needed to be away from you to see it, because sometimes you make me so crazy, Beth, I just... I just love you so much, and you scare me to death."

[Bethany]

Bethany hunches down a little. Scared of me... Gods. "I... my temper is... it's like her, isn't it? How... bitter and... like frozen steel. No give, no warmth."

[Carver Amell]

"I... I guess?" he says, hesitantly. "You care a hell of a lot more, though. That helps."

[Bethany]

"I hate it. I hate me. That- that a part of me is..." Bethan shudder, not noticing the tea splashing on her hand. At least it's not hot, so she won't get... burned... by it...

[Carver Amell]

Carver lets go of her hand, reaching up to stroke her cheek. "We look a little like her, too. She's our mother. You can't erase that, not ever. But it doesn't mean you have to be her. You're so kind and warm and, and you have a fire inside you. If she ever had that, it's long since burned out. Maybe Malcolm smothered it, like Gamlen says. Maybe she just got old. But I'll do anything to protect that fire inside you, Bethany. I promise I won't let you become that."

[Bethany]

His twin finally looks up at him, eyes pained. "Promise me that- that if I ever get that bad- as bad as she was before Mori, not just as bad as she is now, that you won't let me hurt you. Or Merrill or dad or- Promise me that you'll keep me safe that way. That you'll keep my soul safe and stop me, however you have to, before I become someone that hates and hurts like that. Please."

[Carver Amell]

"Of course," he says rapidly, before cracking a smile. "Besides, I'd have to fight off Dad to get to you, I think. There's no way in hell he'd let you hurt me, or Merrill, or yourself, or anyone." 

He strokes her hair again before saying, softly, "I think... I scared him a few times. I know he thinks about it. Once he asked me if I thought you were a danger to yourself, and I didn't know what he meant then, but... he worries. And, when he found me and Merrill, and we all had that fight, he worried. He can't stand either of us saying bad things about ourselves. And we... we had a talk about Mother. Back then. I know he knows to watch out for you, to make sure you're not becoming like her. Just like he watches out for me, makes sure I'm not like Malcolm."

[Bethany]

Bethany smiles faintly. "He... he really did save us. Gods, I can't imagine what it... what would have happened to us if he hadn't been there. Hadn't come to Golden Shores or... been willing to take us in. Make us family. You'd be in a gang for sure, probably one a lot worse than the Bandanas. I'd either be dead or a street whore, like as not. Sorry. That's- you don't want to hear that, I know. Sorry." She takes a deep breath. "Damnit. I meant to- I didn't mean to blurt that out. At the start, about... me. I wanted to ask how you were doing."

[Carver Amell]

He takes a deep breath, lets it out in a sigh. "Dad says it's not my fault. I don't know if I agree. But it doesn't matter. I... I'm hoping I don't have another nightmare tonight because if I do that's three nights in a row and I need to tell Dad. Gods, I'm so glad you didn't see that. Don't visit her."

[Bethany]

Bethany snorts. "Ah, well, I suppose I'll scratch that off my to-do list. I was so looking forward to it, right before my noon acid and salt bath and before my four o'clock- damnit. That was... all sorts of bitchy. Damnit. Wait, three nights? So you've have two already?"

[Carver Amell]

"Ye-es, two nights worth," he admits.