Imprints in Stone [AU]

[Tethras Clan]

It's not long after that night when Merrill finally awakes. And bursts into sobs, clinging to poor, overwhelmed Carver, who just come in to sit with her for a bit after dinner before heading back to Aveline's. Their best guess had figured her for waking late the next day, not today so he's completely off-guard by the sudden, piteous embrace.

[Carver Amell]

Carver blinks, startled, then gently wraps his arms around her. "H-hey." Shit, shit, I don't know what to say, I haven't prepared, written anything down. "Are, is, are you okay? Gods above, I'm glad you're awake."

[Tethras Clan]

'I'm sorry' are the first words he's able to make up from her broken sobs- and the only words for a few minutes. After a minute or so, he recalls the single vial of sedative Varric had given him- fast acting, but short duration, it's very close to a calm emotion potion but not as potent. His dad had given him a good five minute lecture about its use- safety stuff mostly but no small section on his deep the shit he'd be in if he misuses it. In this case however, Carver feels pretty comfortable with giving it to Merrill. 

After a few more moments, Merrill goes silent, though she doesn't relax her tight grip around Carver's torso. At the door, Silence huffs gently, head cocking to the side as if to ask if she should go get help.

[Carver Amell]

"How are you feeling?" he asks, quietly, rubbing her back gently. "Does your head hurt at all?" 

[Tethras Clan]

The elf sniffles a little. "... A little. And my throat," she mutters. "Cried too hard."

[Carver Amell]

"I'm sorry. I know you get headaches. I... I love that you cry, though. I have, I get so embarrassed about crying, it's so... but you just can, like it's nothing."

[Tethras Clan]

Merrill tenses a little as he starts but that fades as he finishes. "...you do?" she whispers. "You don't think I'm... weak or... broken?"

[Carver Amell]

"No." His voice cracks, and he closes his eyes, glad she's holding him so tight so she can't see him tear up. "No. You're perfect. I knew that the day I saw you. I'm sorry I made you think I forgot that, even for a second."

[Tethras Clan]

"I..." Merrill is quiet a moment. "You did. You promised you wouldn't but you did." She doesn't sound angry, just... sad. Resigned.

[Carver Amell]

"Merrill," he whispers. "I remembered, there in your memories. I told you to go home. I told you I was done with family. And you, you thought that meant you, and maybe you were right, because you're family to me, Merrill, and you always will be. If I didn't love you so much, if you weren't home to me, I would have taken you with me. But I sent you with Hunter so you'd be loved and protected even when I couldn't do it for you." 

[Tethras Clan]

Merrill sniffles, body shaking, then a few sobs slip out. "It hurts. It hurts so much. I didn't- I just- everything b-broke and I- I just wwww-wanted to get away. I d-didn't th-think, I j-just..."

[Carver Amell]

"I know," he whispers, his voice raw. "How could I expect you to take care of yourself when I couldn't-- no, when I didn't do it myself? I can't... I can't blame you, for what you did. Not really. Not after.... I don't blame you. I just wish it hadn't happened. I wish you hadn't had to hurt like that."

[Tethras Clan]

"Did... did... are you still... l-leaving?" Merrill asks. Begs.

[Carver Amell]

"No. Not like I was. I might go on a trip, with Aveline, but you can come if you want, or otherwise I'll come back, and I'll write all the time."

[Tethras Clan]

"Like the Oak trip?" Merrill asks slowly. "On the slate?"