Blood from Stone [AU]

[Bethany]

"That's... Garret is..." Beth hesitates, which allows Varric to murmur 'personality mask.' The healer's eyes widen and she nods. "Oh. That... makes a lot more sense than it doesn't. You don't know who... Marian is. So you... create roles, like actors in a play, tailored to the people around you. Or your mood. I think... maybe you can be Marian when you're happy? Like... when you find a joy for yourself, something that makes you happy for your own sake... then... maybe that's a good time to call you Marian?"

[Marian Hawke]

Liz nods, dipping her eyes. "When I'm... You knew me, before. Except Merrill, sorry, but... Varric and Beth both knew who I was. Not all the hidden depths maybe but... I was happy, once. I think. It was hard, but it was my life. I think.. when I... when you see me being that person, but in a good way, that's a good time for it. Like, yesterday I solved a bunch of math puzzles. That would have been a good time. Or, or when I fuss over Beth even though I know she can take care of herself."

[Bethany]

Beth huffs, though the sound is more playful than annoyed. "You and Carver both. Ah well. I suppose it balances out, what with how I shall be coddling and fussing over you."

[Marian Hawke]

She blushes a little. "I don't mean-- I know you can take care of yourself. But sometimes it's nice to have someone care, so I... I like to let it show, how much I care. That's really all."

[Tethras Clan]

Merrill shrugs, not at all offended by Liz's comment. "I don't know Marian, no. But I like to think I know some bits of Liz and I like most of them. And I'd very much love to get you to know you more. And maybe help you find things you like doing." She ducks her head, embarassed. "I... I don't really know what to do with myself either. So... maybe we can look together? Sometimes, if you want I mean."

[Bethany]

Not wanting to speak over Merrill, Beth lifts her hand to bring Liz's own hand to her lips for a light kiss and a smile.

[Marian Hawke]

"I'd like that," says Liz, quietly. "I like you, too, Merrill. You have a... there's just something about you. Something... I'm not sure what. But I'd really like to get to know you better."

[Tethras Clan]

Merrill beams at Liz. "I think maybe it's that I'm submissive too? I..." She blushes, glancing at Varric. "Ummm. I think I'll leave it at... we might have some similar interests? But also, it's be neat to see what else we have in common. Umm. Not reading to kids, but you seemed to like the reading. I'm not as into maths as you and Dad but I really like stories. Oh, and have you ever tried a riddle book? They've a lot of fun, though it's better with someone to ask and someone to answer but Carver gets really, really frustrated, Dad knowns most of them already and..."

[Bethany]

"I'm a terrible cheat who can't stop herself from peeking?" Beth finishes unashamedly. 

[Marian Hawke]

Liz smiles, shaking her head. "It's not the submissive thing -- it's something else. Something... You're just... I don't know. I can't help but smile, around you. You feel like sunshine. I don't know. I think... I think it's that you have hope. You're not naive -- you've been through some bad stuff -- but you still... I don't know. You still think it's worth reading to kids, when the world is so cruel otherwise."

[Tethras Clan]

"But that's exactly why," Merrill says softly. "I have been through terrible things. But... it got better. I'm still..." She licks her lips a little. "I'm still Moonbeam but not all my friends are spirits and pretend anymore. I have a dad and a tuiste and a sister and a Carver and Glimmerwing and- and- It got better. So..." She sniffles. "So it c-can get better. If you w-wait if you look and try and p-pray and trust... it can get b-b-better."

[Bethany]

Reaching across the table, Beth grips Merrill's arm. "Merrill..."

[Marian Hawke]

"But you're not the moon. The moon reflects light, it's pale and dim and weak. You're a sun -- brilliant and warm and full of hope and love. If anyone's a moon, it's me."

[Varric]

Clearing his throat, Varric murmurs, "the kids in Golden Green, where Merrill grew up, used to call her that in public, as a cover for calling her Moonstruck in private. For a elven enclave set on holding to their nature traditions, they were remarkably ignorant and dismissive of a natural-born shaman." 

[Marian Hawke]

"Ah," says Liz. Just that -- one syllable, full of pain and understanding.