Blood from Stone [AU]

[Helene Dakesh]

Helene starts, blushing further blue. "This one is honored."

[Panis zi’Ulthlis]

"And you are most certainly not offputting. It is true that you do not act within... what was the phrase zi'Huntinghawk used? Ah, yes. You do not act within a single standard deviation of the average behavior set, but the vast majority of your... nontypical behaviors drift to the side of more polite or deferental. Which is a far sight better than the heavy-handedness, arrogance, pettiness or outright selfishness I more commonly encounter as 'nontypical' behavior."

[Helene Dakesh]

Helene nods slowly. "This one has come to understand that rudeness is standard behavior in mortals," they admit. "But this one is honored to be thought highly of by one such as Panis."

[Panis zi’Ulthlis]

I get the strong impression that... ne? They? That Helene has simply redefined 'Panis' to mean Lord Hand of Nyra. "You flatter me with your regard, Helene. If I might ask, I do not with to offend with an assumption. Do you use ne, ner and nis for your pronouns?"

[Helene Dakesh]

"I--" they begin, stunned. They swallow, trying again. "This one had not been given to understand that such was... appropriate for mortals to use."

[Panis zi’Ulthlis]

"I think Lady Raustrinxang would like to have a word with anyone that tells ner ne can't use them," Panis says with a soft laugh, nodding slightly to the apparent female on the other side of Varric. "And ne is not the only person I have me- mortal rather- who uses outsider words for themselves."

[Helene Dakesh]

"I... This one had been using They and Them," they say softly. "But... this one will give the matter more consideration. Thank you very much for this knowledge, and have you any need of divination in the future, please do not hesitate to call upon this one." At no charge.

[Panis zi’Ulthlis]

Pursing his lips, Panis leans in. "If you wish to speak with someone who has made something of a study of gender and such things, from an outsider's perspective, you might consider requesting a visitation from Anirṇanīyōjaka." That is axomic for... Organizing the Undefinable. A tulwath name, and based on the language, one not belonging to Tereis or Ere'lyn.

[Helene Dakesh]

Helene nods again. "Understood, and very much appreciated."

[Coquette Blacquin]

Cindy knows her hosts well; she's arranged for 'an urgent matter' to whisk Helene away shortly after dinner, giving the Seeker the time they need to decompress. While that's happening, they organize more dancing, card tables, and a silent auction of some of the art pieces (all funds going to charity, of course). By all accounts, the entertainment is well organized, and there's not a single duel -- something that, later, Cindy is immensely proud of.

Her head is barely in any of it.

When the party breaks apart, when it's late enough that leaving won't be seen as a dereliction of duty, she finds Shannon already waiting in the carriage, eager to get back to speaking. They, and Shannon's bodyguard, head to her home, stopping to pick up a simple, elegant chocolate cake along the way.

The ride is spent mostly in silence, Shannon seeming to be lost in thought and likely rehearing something in her head, based on how her lips move from time to time. Soon enough- or perhaps too soon by the apprehension in Shannon's eyes- Cindy is letting them into the house, the Warbound being instructed to find a place to park the carriage and wait nearby. Her home is too empty these days with only her and Vig -- and yet, she worries that it will seem humble, perhaps too small, for someone like Shannon.

She needn't have worried. If Shannon notes how small the place is, she doesn't comment. Over cake, Cindy lays out more of the facts: her relationship with Mel, and later Mel's family; her partner, and the ill fortune that came of that; her engagement, and the mystery of her missing memories; her heritage, her eating disorder, her father's command. She skims over her time in the asylum, and she does not reveal how close to death she came on numerous occasions, but otherwise, she is honest, if brief. She speaks a little of Liz, how she was broken when they met (though not by what) and how she attempted to top her into being whole once more. Finally, as she winds down, she says of the breakup only, "there was a fight, and a bad one. I realized that I was not doing her as much good as I had hoped -- that perhaps I was slowing her recovery, rather than aiding it. So I ended things, stayed with my mother for a while and sent her back to her father. And now... here we are."

[Shannon zi'Marass]

Shannon listens with surprising intensity and patience, neither of those being characteristics that Cindy would have chosen to describe her first friend. She says little during the recitation. She asks of Gold's fate, muttering a simple 'no need to adjust the plan then' before nodding for Cindy to continue. Her eyes narrow and a mental note is made in regards to the missing memories. She rolls her eyes at Cindy's carefully braced reveal of her heritage. 

"You have silver hair, have dominion over shadows and elven features. Add some grey to your skin and another couple of inches to your bust and hips and you'd be culturally obligated to call yourself Mistress Smith. Besides, I prefer a little wicked in my sweet."

The eating disorder and her treatment from Harrod is met with a cracked teacup handle, though Shannon does't notice. Nor, The Scale might note, is she harmed despite the sharp porcelain she had gripped for at least two seconds. When they return to the story, when they get to Liz, Shannon grows a little tense. Hearing of how Cindy topped Liz, extensively, her expression grows troubled. To her credit, she doesn't show any relief or pleasure at hearing of the breakup. "I... I... you awe me. That you have suffered through all that and yet still stand upright. Still keep moving forward. I think... I think I always knew you were for more than just wearing a man's name and bearing his brats. And so you are."

[Coquette Blacquin]

She bows her head. "I wanted that, you know," she says, quietly. "Marriage. Children. But I think on some level I knew... I had to make a decision. Justice? Or my own happiness? It had to be justice. But I entertained thoughts that someday I'd retire, I'd have done enough and I could wed. It won't happen, of course. The work will never be done. Liz was a partner to me, for a while, but I felt guilty even then, dragging her into it. She hadn't the temperment for it. So."

She shrugs, spreading her hands wide, palms up. "Do you still want me? Knowing all this?"

[Shannon zi'Marass]

"I do. I... I cannot be your partner as she was. But I can support you, Resources, information, healing. And maybe... less... tangible support. If... that is... you want me after..." Shannon looks down, studying her hands carefully. "I have... done a great many things that I feel sick and ashamed of doing. I did them willingly and knowingly. I did them because I wanted the power, favor, money- something- each time. I... I thought it would be worth it, if I could just.."

[Coquette Blacquin]

"Have you truck with slavers?" she asks, mercilessly. At her headshake, Coquette continues: "Rape? Torture? Handing innocents over to be raped or tortured?"

[Shannon zi'Marass]

"...torture, yes," Shannon admits softly. "Not... innocents, at least I..." She swallows. "I could not..." She swallows yet again, looking ill. "I could not... rape or... permit it even, not... No." No, I have to... I can't repay her honesty with lies, even omission. "As for... If... if I had- if dealing in slaves had given me a quicker, more certain path, I... I can't be sure I wouldn't have taken it."