Blood from Stone [AU]

[Coquette Blacquin]

"I.. I've been good for her," she whimpers, a strained, pitiful cry. "Ha-haven't I? I've been... I've been good to her. I took care of her. I tried, I really tried. Wasn't I... wasn't I good enough?"

[Varric]

Gods above, below, sideways and twix the tween. "You- yes. You were-" He coughs a little, shuffles forward, and pats her arm gingerly. "You did everything you were capable of doing. You got her out of that hellhole, you gave her a purpose and you gave her the strength she needed to start rebuilding. But Cindy... you're not whole yourself. You can't rebuild someone else when you've gaping holes in your own soul. And you shouldn't, don't, have to. Let us help. Really help. Please."

[Coquette Blacquin]

"I.."

They'll say you're abusing her. Just like Merrill and Helene. 

Something wounded flashes across her eyes, something lost and hurt. Then she shuts off, straightening, swallowing hard as she tries to get control of herself.

"I will watch her," she says quietly. 

[Varric]

"Cindy," he says softly. "Liz or fear and pride."

[Coquette Blacquin]

"It's not pride," she snaps. "I won't let her be alone again. Not ever. No matter what."

[Varric]

"She won't be," he points out, frowning slightly. "Why would she be? Hellsfire, even in death she'd not be alone." A second later, he realizes he should clarify with, "my mother- pointed ears or not, she'd be thrilled to mother some grandkids."

[Coquette Blacquin]

"I..."

But she can't argue against that. Liz is the one with the big family, the ones who had taken her back in even seeing how bad off she was. The ones who had gone and fought her inner demons, literally, for a chance to bring her back to them whole and safe. Liz would be fine without Cindy.

It's me who wouldn't be okay without her.

She hangs her head, hands trembling, taking a deep breath. "I'm sorry," she says, gently. "I'm just afraid." Please. Please don't let her leave me.

[Varric]

"...neither would you," he says, patting her arm again, the gesture still awkward. Then again, the only one he seems really comfortable with touching, is, perhaps oddly, Merrill. Then again, given how little regard the elf has for personal space, he might have just gotten over-exposed to the point of uncaring. "Even beyond the Smiths, you have family. The kids," twenties or not, still and always, they're his kids, "might put Liz first, yes, but they do like you. Only real thing between you is the walls you're protecting yourself with."

[Coquette Blacquin]

"That's not true," she whispers. "The walls are there for a reason. Merrill got a glimpse behind them yesterday, and Helene fled from me like... like I was a monster."

[Varric]

Varric raises an eyebrow. "If you thought Will's girlfriend was abusing him. If you got even a hint of suspicion on the matter..."

[Coquette Blacquin]

Her grin isn't joyous, nor is it kind, nor even sad. It's predatory, like a big cat. "She wouldn't live long enough to be arrested." 

Then it vanishes, and she shakes her head. "So I have to keep my distance."

[Varric]

"Except that you're not abusing her. Helene had never, ah, encountered that sort of... lifestyle before. They've spoken with Zevran and..." He grimaces. "Well, they're researching it now. So that's sorted. Merrill is fine. I spoke with her, to see if she was confused or had any questions and..." He can't stop himself from shuddering noticeably. "She's... she, ah, isn't- she's fine with it. That... stuff." Understatement much?

[Coquette Blacquin]

"Aren't I?" she asks quietly, her voice barely audible. Not waiting for an answer, she turns back to the bed, aiming for her side of it, out of Merrill's way.

[Tethras Clan]

"Hullo," Merrill says quietly, offering a smile at Cindy. "She seems to be settling a touch, though she keeps reaching. I think she knows I'm not you."

[Coquette Blacquin]

"I'm here," she murmurs tenderly, laying atop the covers so she can wrap an arm around Liz, holding her gently. "I'm here. It's alright."

She stiffens a moment later, as Liz whimpers, twitching like she wants to be free. Slowly, her heart breaking, she unwinds her arm from Liz's body. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," she whispers. 

Liz twitches again, shifting a little, clearly uncomfortable, clearly having a bad dream, but not waking. Not yet.