Blood from Stone [AU]

[Carver Amell]

"Well.. yeah. I figure it's pretty standard stuff: date, move in, marriage, kids. Right?"

[Tethras Clan]

"Not... always, no. Not every marriage produces children, not all courting leads to living together or marriage. I'm not saying no, just... that's well in the future. At least five years, likely more, for children. From me anyway."

[Carver Amell]

"I mean, I know, sometimes people break up and shit, but I'm not going to assume we're going to break up before we even start. And... Five years I can deal with. I just want kids someday."

[Tethras Clan]

"Or more. My career, my duty, is very important to me. I can't afford to take nearly a year off and I certainly can't justify being an active guard member while pregnant. I... I know that forty is fairly old to be starting a family but... well, I am a paladin and very, very healthy, so that shouldn't be a problem, physically." She starts to run a hand through her hair but checks herself before messing up the garnets therein. 

[Carver Amell]

"I... Can I change your mind? It's just, I know I'm a bit young, so five years is fine really, but, not if... not if five years means never."

[Tethras Clan]

"I... I sort of doubt it. Seli tried- she had this idea about us both being pregnant at the same time, our children would be the same age. I thought her insane. Both of us pregnant? And the twins are a handful enough already, I can't imagine adding a third." Aveline sighs a little, then slowly moves towards him. "But I do want children, eventually. Seli was successful in that for sure. The twins are... they're precious beyond all words."

[Carver Amell]

"Then, then we need to figure out how old is too old to have any reliable chance," he says, firmly. "And set a deadline there. Because I don't know what the cutoff is but I don't want to accidentally miss my chance. I'm not... I know you're with other people, and that's okay, I'll figure out how to adjust to that as I go, but I don't really have an interest in being married twice like that. I could see maybe having an arrangement with Jass, but that's not.... I want a wife and kids I can come home to, and I only want one of those. I don't want to be with you long-term and also have to find someone else to have my kids. You know? And, and if we break up it'll get messy, so it's better to try and figure this stuff out early."

[Tethras Clan]

Aveline frowns a little, then shrugs. "I... suppose determining if we have... significant differences in life goals early is wise. Though...... sometimes Seli asks me, when we-" She coughs, a slight flush creeping up her neck. "Early on, is... When did you decide what you want in life and have you made sure you still do? I... I have to admit, when she made me sit and think things over again, I had changed a lot from the eighteen year old that decided she wanted a small home with her childhood sweetheart, no kids but maybe a cat. I was planning to transfer to the training core after sergeant at the time. Clearly, things have changed. I knew that my career goals had shifted, a great deal, but I hadn't thought about the personal side of things."

[Carver Amell]

Carver nods. "That's not a problem here -- I've been, uh, thinking a lot. Because of Beth, you know. With being an uncle. I was wondering, after she announced, if.. honestly, if helping to raise Beth's kids would be enough for me. And maybe? But I'd prefer my own, as well. I'd love her kids to have cousins to play with. I'd love to be a father, a real father, not just an uncle. I was considering if Jass would have me, and if so I think I'd be okay, but I'd prefer to have kids. But Jass can't move to Nyra and isn't interested in a real relationship, just friendship and maybe occasional fucking. So that's out. But, anyway, I've been thinking about kids a ton lately. I agree I'm too young -- I'm still worried about Beth being this young -- but someday, maybe soon."

[Tethras Clan]

Aveline nods slowly. "I... similar with me, actually. With the twins. With watching Seli increase and... gods, some of it looked horrid, though my gifts and general fitness will serve me well. But there were these moments... When the bump first really showed, watching her lay there and gently stroke the skin. That first flutter of movement. Feeling her lay against me, her back aching, her feet swollen and pained, her body exhausted and seeing her smile like her whole world was complete." Unaware of her own action, she raises a hand to press against her belly. "So... so children, I think we are mostly agreed on. Marriage... what do you expect out of that? No, sorry, better question. What do  you need from being married? What can you not compromise on, and what's flexible but precious?"

[Carver Amell]

"I..."

Here he hesitates. "I thought I wanted exclusivity but... I think... I think it might be alright. I'm going to try, anyway, and I'll let you know if it turns out that was a harder rule than I hope. But I want commitment. I want to be... I can't have kids with someone who's going to turn and run when things get hard. I can't have kids with someone who won't love them, who won't be in their life no matter what, who isn't in it until death. I won't do that to children. So that's a hard rule. But I don't think you're a coward, so I think that's fine?"

[Tethras Clan]

Aveline nods, a soft smile on her lips. "That won't be a problem, no. I'll be blunt. I'm married, with two children. If I was younger and had less to lose, I'd be more willing to risk. But at this point, I won't have sex with you until I'm committed to making a life with you, be that marriage or simply a life-long partner. Breaking up with you... I'm already invested enough in you that losing you would hurt me terribly. Any deeper and... And it'll hurt me enough to do real harm to my family. I can't do that to them."

[Carver Amell]

Carver stares at her a moment, doing some mental math. "You don't want kids for at least five years. You don't want sex before marriage. You want me to be sexually faithful -- but how long are you planning to make me wait?!"

[Tethras Clan]

Aveline stiffens, eyes narrowing. Then she checks herself. This is Carver. Focus on the intent, not the phrasing. "One. I never asked you to be sexually faithful. I said I would be uncomfortable with you having casual sex if we were together. You can push back on that if it's important to you or seek out other partners in addition to me."

[Carver Amell]

"I don't want other partners. I am glad Seli and Lovan make you happy but I don't want that. I want a partner, faithful and loving, with the same goals I have. It souds more and more like what you want is... I don't know. A mistress maybe."