The Amell Legacy: Transgressions

[Haliel Lightsong]

"I am... I am disgusted it was done to you," Haliel says carefully. "Trusting someone that you thought cared for you is... is not ever something I could be disgusted about. You should have been able to trust... that thing. You were foolish but that should never- you paid far, far too much for that mistake. You were raped."

[Marian Hawke]

"I wasn't," she says quickly. "Beth was raped. I was-- I gave consent, blanket consent."

[Zevran]

"Bullshit," Zevran says firmly. "One-  such a thing does not exist. Consent must be informed to be valid, and, as you cannot know every possible kink or sex act, you cannot simply consent to everything."

[Marian Hawke]

"But I did," she whispers. "I consented. If-- if anyone raped me, it was me. Agreeing to put that on, agreeing to be a t-t-toy."

[Zevran]

"Did they explain what it would do?" Zevran asks pointedly. "Did you have a safeword, a way to stop if you changed your mind?"

[Marian Hawke]

She shakes her head. "T-tanna s-said s-safewords are for c-cowards."

[Haliel Lightsong]

"Well, she's a literal incarnation of fucking evil so... assume she was lying about everything until you confirm it elsewhere," Haliel says tightly. 

[Marian Hawke]

Fucking? Is she making a pun or-- even for a pun, to hear her curse like that is...

She takes a deep breath, lets it out. "I didn't touch the kid," she says, after a moment. "I think maybe.. I think she might have suggested the toybox as punishment, because I didn't... I told her I wasn't afraid, I just would rather do something more fun, that it seemed too tame."

[Haliel Lightsong]

"Good," Haliel breathes out with clear relief. She could have forgiven even that, given the context but... she's very glad she doesn't have to. "Good. I am sorry that you were- that you raped, and so..."

[Zevran]

"Horrifically?" Zevran supplies. 

[Marian Hawke]

But Marian's already shaking her head. "No, it-- I-- I didn't touch her, but I watched. I saw what they were doing. I tried to make myself... she saw me. The look she gave me, it... it jarred me right out of my mindset. I couldn't, after that. I just couldn't. I was... I did... with one of the chained adults. Gods. A slave. I beat a slave."

[Zevran]

The skin around Zevran's eyes tighten and he's silent as he takes a few seconds to work past that. To move past his past.

[Haliel Lightsong]

"Then make it better," Haliel says firmly. "You feel guilty... ashamed and... soiled by this? Then make it better. Write down anything and everything you can come up with to identify the people, the location, everything you can. And then we'll copy it out and pass it on to the Vangal, Ciren and Bastion churches."

[Marian Hawke]

She nods. "I will. In the morning. I can't-- I can't, right now. It's not much. I -- it's not much. But. And we can, we can tell people about Tanna. Someone has to know who her friends are. Right? We can hunt her down. And... gods. I can't..."

Her hands are shaking, and she struggles to breathe more evenly, to stop shaking, to focus. 

[Haliel Lightsong]

"Deep breathes, Beloved. Deep breaths. You're safe now. We're right here, you're safe. We can stop for now, alright? And- and- and I'm sure Varric can give you a sleep tonic or something tonight, something dreamless," Haliel says soothingly. "Anything else you need to sleep too, okay? I can stand guard all night if you want, or you can have the room to yourself or- or whatever you need."