Ghost Story

[Marian Hawke]

"Drake Lewis. Dark skin, darker than mine, with -- well I don't know if he still has dreads, but he did when we dated. Broad flat nose, big lips." Nobody he's seen around town, that's for sure.

[Varric]

Some(one to hunt down)thing to follow up on later. "Was he your only... boyfriend?" There's a slight twist on that word, almost a verbal sneer.

[Marian Hawke]

She narrows her eyes. "What's that supposed to mean? Yes, he was the only one."

[Varric]

"Just wondering how many targets I have, he says blandly. "The guard died so that's out of my hands but Drake might still be staining this plane."

[Marian Hawke]

"What the hell? Why would you kill my boyfriend?!"

[Varric]

"Ex-boyfriend and rapist." He waves his hand at the wrist to signal a minor concession. "Or at least an emotional and sexual abuser."

[Marian Hawke]

"What the hell, he didn't-- he never--"

[Varric]

"He never pressured you into sex?" Varric cuts in. "Never pushed or pressed when you weren't sure or weren't interested? Never made sex a requirement for his kindness or support?"

[Marian Hawke]

"Everyone does that."

[Varric]

"No, they don't," Varric replies simply, a sad, kind look in his eyes.

[Marian Hawke]

"Of course he wanted sex. Boys always want sex, especially teenage boys. It's fine. I told him no a lot and eventually I had to say yes because why else would we be dating if we're not having sex, that's part of the whole thing, so I told him I didn't want to get knocked up and he suggested doing it from behind and it bled because I'm a virgin but that's all normal stuff, that's how boyfriends and girlfriends work."

[Varric]

"I-- wh-- no, that--" He breaks off and turns to the workbench. Grabbing some paper, he writes rapidly, scowls for a second, then writes another line. "Here," he says curtly, thrusting the scrap of paper at at her. 

Too angry for speaking linearly.

• Anal sex should never cause noticable bleeding. Micro tears often happen but shouldn't bleed enough to be visible to the naked eye. There's no hymen in your ass.
• Anal sex shouldn't hurt either. There might be some ache or discomfort, certainly when first starting, but if done properly, that should be minor. 
• Most boys want sex, yes, though I'd like to point out some don't. Such as me, even as a teenager.
• Helene and I were married for years before we had anything that most would define as sex. And were happy leading up to that point.
• A good boyfriend wouldn't have pushed if you weren't ready. A decent boyfriend would have at least taken care and comforted you afterwards. And stopped when you were hurt for that matter.

You. Fucking. Matter. Stopping dismissing your pain.

[Marian Hawke]

She reads the note again and again, her hand over her mouth, until she can't see for the tears in her eyes. "He.... lied to me?"

[Varric]

"I swear on my marriage vows that what I wrote on that paper is the truth as I know it, based on over a hundred years of experience and significant academic research." Varric takes a slow breath, still wrestling with his temper. Feel more emotional (un-rational) lately. Annoying. "If he said something contrary, then yes. He lied. I'm sorry."

[Marian Hawke]

"What's wrong with me? That it hurt so bad?"