Imprints in Stone [AU]

[Carver Amell]

"Close enough, for someone like me."

[Tethras Clan]

"Really? So if I went and told your family what you were doing..."

[Carver Amell]

"Fine," he shrugs. "I just don't want them to waste time worrying about someone like me. You can if you want."

[Tethras Clan]

"You don't think it would hurt them?" Aveline asks softly. "Knowing that someone they care for, someone they love, is hurting themselves?"

[Carver Amell]

He hesitates. "Dad was... Mad, last time. But then I fucked everything up with Beth. Uh. Maybe don't tell Beth." He sounds considerably more like himself while distracted, at least.

[Tethras Clan]

"Will you do it again? Or will you find another way to deal with your emotions when you get hurt and angry?" Aveline counters.

[Carver Amell]

His gaze hardens. "No. You're the Paladin. You still have honor left. If you think she needs to know, tell her. But you have to protect her. She's innocent in all this."

[Tethras Clan]

Aveline smiles faintly. "And that right there isn't honor?" she asks pointedly. How can I... "What did you feel? When you said what you did to Merrill? What were you feeling then?"

[Carver Amell]

"I--"

The fire goes out of him then, that awful blankness returning. "I thought Dad had... I thought.. this whole time, all of it, my whole family, since Golden Shores, was based on a terrible lie. I didn't, I gave up on family."

[Tethras Clan]

"That... must have been devastating," Aveline says softly. "To have that thought in you. Your sister hiding away, making you think she's dead. Your father agreeing to it, helping her. That's a deep and painful betrayal. I..." She takes a deep breath. "I couldn't imagine how I'd feel to discover that... that either of my parents had helped my fiance fake his death, that he'd been living somewhere else else all this time."

[Carver Amell]

He doesn't mean to, but his face twists, and before he knows it, fat tears drop down his cheeks. "It doesn't matter. It's no excuse."

[Tethras Clan]

"It... You're right. It doesn't excuse it. But it does make it forgivable," Aveline says softly.

[Carver Amell]

"What? How?!" He demands. "She nearly--!"

[Tethras Clan]

Aveline holds up a hand. "Forgivable, not forgiven. The difference is important. You didn't act out of malice or spite. You were hurting and you made a poor decision, to seek out drink instead of counsel or comfort. That lead to you losing control of yourself and hurting someone you love. Badly. It'll take a lot of work, but you can make up for it. You can earn forgiveness. Not through self-flagellation- ah, not through beating yourself up over it. Emotionally or physically," she adds, giving his arm a pointed look. "But by improving yourself. By proving you can become better than you were."

[Carver Amell]

"But I can't," he whispers.