The Silver Queen [AU]

[Tethras Clan]

Zevran clucks his tone. "The one that loves me. That one that cares for Carver, Helene, T, even the mabari. The one that has earned the loyalty of the crew, that inspires them. The heart that refuses to be tamed, that constantly moves forward but never forgets the scars earned by the past. The heart that pushes you to helping people, caring about them, even if you refuse to admit it. Oh, you're no hero, but your heart? Perhaps just a bit of it."

[Isabela]

She's weeping silently by the time he finishes, pressing her face against his chest once more. "I can't," she whispers again. "I can't do this again. I can't. Three, this is three times, I can't--"

[Tethras Clan]

"...the first time, you had to do it alone. The second time, I was... nearly as broken as you. But this time I can help you," Zevran says thickly. "So will Carver and Helene. Let us help you, beloved. Please."

[Isabela]

"Will you be next?" she whispers, shuddering. 

[Tethras Clan]

"...next?" Zevran asks cautiously.

[Isabela]

"First Luis, then Hawke, then Lady Olocaryn -- who next?" she whispers. 

[Tethras Clan]

"That- I would ne- Haw-" Zevran stills his tongue, taking a deep breath. "Luis was a monster. So was Ozymandias. Hawke... Hawke would never had done that. That thing was just... wearing her face. It wasn't her. We would never..." He swallows, hard, looking sickened.

[Isabela]

"She would never, but she died and she did. Lady Olocaryn would never, but she was entrapped and enslaved and when it came to her or me, she picked herself. You would never... but if you were made to, if you were pushed, if you had to..."

[Tethras Clan]

"...I cannot say that there is no chance that magic could not control my body," Zevran admits slowly. "I would rather die than... hurt you, hurt anyone, that way. I... I made that choice, after Hawke freed me. Chains, death, torture... I will not sell my soul. Hawke would never rape you. I can only imagine how hard it was, to have a monster wearing her face... do that. But it wasn't her. It would never be me."

[Isabela]

"It felt like her," she whispers, shuddering. "It sounded like her, it moved like her. It wouldn't have to be you."

[Tethras Clan]

Zevran gives her a helpless look. "I cannot stop such a fate. I can try, yes, and I would. But... there are no guarantees, my love. I am sorry. All I can do is promise that I will try. That I would stop it if I could. Save you if I can. And be with you after, to... Hold you. Talk to you. Sing and guard you. To help you heal, however I could."

[Isabela]

"I don't want to heal," she says bitterly. "What's the point? So I can hand myself over on a platter again?"

[Tethras Clan]

"You didn't-" Zevran takes a breath. "You took a risk and it... cost you."

[Isabela]

"I can't keep doing this," she whispers, then takes a step back, away from him. "Maybe you should leave me here."

[Tethras Clan]

"What?" Zevran asks, startled. "Leave you where?"