The Amell Legacy: Transgressions

[Marian Hawke]

"I didn't... I didn't want to," she whispers, and the tears begin to drip down her cheeks again. "But I wanted somewhere safe to hide and I... I figured I'd better get used to it, and I... I just kept doing math in my head, let him do what he wanted with my mouth."

[Varric]

Varric has to swallow a few times and focus very hard on the wall behind Marian- the wall near her waist so her mouth is out of his sight- before he can reply. "Never. Never just... get used to that. Any of that. You eve need a place to stay, you find me. Might not be pretty or fancy, but I'll see to a roof if you need it. Ever."

[Marian Hawke]

"You won't always be there," she whispers. "I have to live this life, I have to get harder than I am. I can't be... I can't be weak, or soft, or too good to get my hands dirty."

[Varric]

"Suppose I'm not immortal, true," he allows. "So I teach you so more skills. You have some already- scribing is good, honest work that pays fairly well. You might have to start in a scriptorium doing rough work but with your talent and training, you'd be out in a month or two for sure. But I'll teach you brewing, maybe some infusions if you have any talent in that regard. Finance and other business stuff. Seeker already taught you languages- over a dozen of them, right? That's solid wages too. You have options and can get more options. Come hells or abyss, you will never have to make that choice again."

[Marian Hawke]

"And where will I go? I only have another month before I'm seventeen. I can't stay here, now that I'm made. Seeker plans to stay here, and far as I know you do too."

[Varric]

"Not forever. As soon as I get a better grasp of what the fuck is happening with Orzammar, then I need to start plans on going back. But I do plan to finish things here first." He studies Marian. "You don't think the twins will want you around after? If this goes as far as it seems it might, they might need you to act as regent until they're of age."

[Marian Hawke]

"Can't. I'm a bastard. I can't take power, and someone has to be the Light." She takes a deep breath, lets it out. "It happens to everyone, I guess," she says, softer. "Seeker, or nearly. Beth. Me. Just have to put it behind me and keep moving."

[Varric]

"It shouldn't and fuck accepting it as normal." Varric grits his teeth, blows out a breath. "And actually, you can be regent despite having some questions in regard to your birth. Not... entirely sure you inherit entire, I'd have to check that but you can regent just fine. Hells, I can think of at least one instance where the regent of a Light seat was the bastard of the Light's father's mistress by another man. So not even a blood relation."

[Marian Hawke]

Marian is quiet for a moment. Finally, she says softly, "I could do what Mother did. Then Carol wouldn't have to inherit at all, not the Lighthood anyway."

[Varric]

The dwarf cocks his head. "Do what... Leandra did? Get strung out on tonics and ignore your children?"

[Marian Hawke]

"Mother had me, but then my father died. She came back to Nyra, and she married Malachi who had money but no heirs so that the Amell family could finally recover their lighthood. We have a lighthood, there are other families who would be eager to get in the Lantern. Carol names me regent, then abdicates in favor of my husband when she's of age; we keep our money and our standard of living, but she's free."

[Varric]

"Wouldn't need to be a husband. Magic can bypass the need for a male/female combination for breeding," Varric says mildly. "And two... do any of you actually care about being a Light? Because if not, then... you can step down. You can just be fabulously wealthy without the politics."

[Marian Hawke]

She shakes her head. "The Amell family has been trying to get our seat back for two generations, and were fighting to keep it for three more before then. Our entire family would probably come back to haunt us if we let it lapse inside of one generation."

[Varric]

"Any ancestor that puts a title over the wellbeing of their descendants doesn't deserve to have a legacy." Varric shrugs. "But again... you can go as regent. Until they're of age, if one of them wants it, or until they have a kid that does. Or you have a kid. Something to work out with them, after they're able to think clear and such. But you're fairly solidly qualifying for Lighthood at the moment so no need for a martyr's marriage."

[Marian Hawke]

"Varric. I can't be Regent. I'm not trained for it, I've not got the breeding for it, I'm... They'd string me up."