The Amell Legacy: Transgressions

[Haliel Lightsong]

"Hurt, useless, unwanted. Jealous." Her voice cracks on the last, and she almost doesn't need to say the last. "Ashamed."

[Marian Hawke]

"I-- what? You're-- you're rejecting me," blurts Marian.

[Haliel Lightsong]

"I'm what?" Haliel blurts out as her head snaps around to face Marian, eyes wide. "I- what?"

[Varric]

"Alright, Marian, your turn- what did you think Shiny here did since she showed up just now?"

[Marian Hawke]

"She-- as soon as I admitted-- she turned away, she started to leave. She can't, she doesn't want to deal with my shit."

[Haliel Lightsong]

"But- I was just- I got in the way," Haliel says with confusion. "Mister Tethras was- he was helping you and- and I almost attacked him. I was-  I almost ruined it and- I just-" She blinks rapidly, tears of her own falling. "Everytime- I just want to help but- but I always make it worse."

[Marian Hawke]

Marian takes a step back, chewing her lower lip. I can't-- I don't know-- I've done it wrong already, literally two minutes and I've already fucked up somehow, I tried to be more honest but I just made things worse... "I'm sorry," she whispers. "I'll just... I'll just go..."

[Varric]

"Stop!" Varric says quickly. "Lightsong, Marian seems to... you know how Seeks has trouble with reading the mood? With figuring how people's emotions? Marian is the same, just better at hiding her confusion. You can't assume she knows how you're feeling unless you say it ou-"

[Haliel Lightsong]

Haliel doesn't wait for him to finish, instead taking two quick steps so she can pull Marian into a hug. "Please don't go. You're my first friend, my best friend. You're kind and smart and funny and generous and you hurt so much inside and it's wrong for you to be alone. I don't want to be alone either. I'm sorry I'm so bad at this. Please let me keep trying, I'll get better at being a friend, I promise."

[Marian Hawke]

Marian throws her arms around Lightsong, sobbing on the paladin's shoulder, shoulders shuddering. 

[Haliel Lightsong]

Haliel gathers Marian close, then slowly lowers them both to the ground so the merikos elf can half sit on Haliel's legs. "Shhh," she says softly, rubbing her back. "It... it can get better. I'll keep trying. It can get better."

[Marian Hawke]

It can get better. It has to. Things have to get better. She nods, unable to summon more words, just crying on the paladin's shoulder and letting her comfort her.

[Haliel Lightsong]

Haliel rocks slowly, stroking Marian's hair. "I love you Marian and I wish never to hurt you. I will, I know. Gods, I wish I could promise not to, but I can't. But if I do, please ask me why. Please ask me to explain, to tell you why I did what I did. Give me a chance to make it right."

[Marian Hawke]

She nods, sniffling. "I'll try," she whispers. "I'll try. One more chance. I promise I'll really try my best, to live instead of.. instead of climbing trees."

[GamesMaster]

Life goes on.

Everyone feeling a bit wrung out emotionally, naps are had; Helene sits with Marian until the apprentice falls asleep, stroking her hair gently, trying to get across nir feelings without knowing quite what to say. Varric and Roland do better with distractions, being on their feet; Roland asks around, looking for the best druid to help Storm, as Varric gets to work on a commission for Isabela, who plans to leave in the morning. 

After seeing Isabela off, the group head to the Tree, looking for the fleshcrafting specialist: Dau, he's named apparently, and he can be found at the Oak, where most of the higher ranking druids live. 

Storm -- Carver -- holds his head up as best he can, having done what he could with one of Lightsong's breastbands and some bandages over top, trying to flatten himself down. It works well enough; Marian tells him she wouldn't have pegged him for a girl, but he can still see the edges of things in the mirror, his curves, his round baby face. So he holds his head up, not from bravery, but in sheer defiance. I refuse to be a woman. I want to be fixed.