Ghost Story

[Varric Thedas]

Varric coughs awkwardly. "Uh, yeah. Well. She talked around it enough that I finally clued in. It's, well, it's just not something I consider on my own. Ever."

[Marian Hawke]

"I-- I know. I know you have no interest in me. It's fine. I didn't expect-- it's fine."

[Varric]

"Anyone," Varric corrects her tersely. 

[Marian Hawke]

"Because of your spouse?"

[Varric]

"That's... part of it." Varric shifts his weight from foot to foot as he studies the wall behind Emma. "Not most of it," he admits.

[Marian Hawke]

"Then what?"

[Varric]

"Not really relevant," Varric replies with a shrug. "Point is that I'm not interested in you or anyone else that way. You're my apprentice, not a romantic prospect."

[Marian Hawke]

Emma looks away. "What if... nevermind."

[Varric]

"No what ifs," he says gently. "Sorry."

[Marian Hawke]

"Okay," she says, but her eyes brim with tears. "I'm going back to my book." Her throat tightens her voice into a squeak, but she manages to avoid running as she turns and exits the room. 

[Varric]

"Emma! Doesn't mean you're-- we're-- less," he calls after her, chest tight. 

[Marian Hawke]

"Sure it doesn't," she says bitterly. 

[Varric]

Oh no you don't. Varric strides after her. "Why does sticking my dick in you make a relationship better?" he demands.

[Marian Hawke]

Emma whirls, shouting without meaning to: "How about you wanting something from me! Anything! At least if I was your girlfriend we'd be partners -- now I'm just some, some homeless waif you've decided to take under your wing."

[Varric]

That doesn't sound (healthy, desirable) like we'd be partners. "We're not partners. Yet," he adds with great emphasis. "An apprenticeship is an investment. I'll devote time, texts, supplies, funds and so forth with the expectation that you'll learn and grow. That one day you'll surpass me, carry on my knowledge and teachings past my death. That you'll be my legacy. That's what you offer; the only immortality an honest and moral mountain dwarf ever needs. I let you stay because of pity. I started to teach you out of curiosity and boredom. I offered you a place in my Clan, my family, because you--" His voice cracks. "Because you're the first person or cause I've cared for since my Helene dies. Because you've a mind rarer and richer than a chest filled with diamonds. Because teaching you makes me the happiest I've been in over a decade. Because i-- I--"

At the last moment, his courage fails him and he shies sway from the depths of his heart. "I care about you."