The Family [Finished]

[accalia]

"I call bullshit on that, but carry on." Tony states firmly, indicating he does not agree with Vic's fatalism but also that he wants the explanation to continue.

[yamikuronue]

Vic nods. "So I guess..."

He stops again, trailing off into silence. He knows what comes next. He knows what he should say. But. He just. Can't say it? Doesn't say it. Continues to not say it, despite wanting to say it.

Wanting to...

This is so stupid. It doesn't matter what you want. You have to do this. For your family. For your future. For Tony. Usually that would unstick the words right from his throat. But... it doesn't. The words still don't come. He stares down at his empty plate, and is surprised to notice the lump in his throat, the burning behind his eyes that indicate tears. And yet.

Just say it! Just get out the words and this can all be over. Everything will be fine.

But he doesn't say it.

[accalia]

Tony just looks at Vic, waiting for him to work up to the next part.

[yamikuronue]

Vic doesn't say anything. And doesn't say anything. And then, all at once, his face crumples.  Then he wraps his arms around his stomach, head bowed, and begins to rock back and forth in his chair.

What's happening to me?! His breath comes in large, ragged gulps, and the hot tears stream down his face.

[accalia]

Tony still doesn't say anything, but he does stand and walk to touch Vic on the shoulder, offering silent support.

[yamikuronue]

"I can't," he whispers. "Why? Why can't I?"

[accalia]

Tony says nothing but the hand on Vic's should tightens slightly in a comforting squeeze

[yamikuronue]

"This should be easy. I don't even... I never wanted to be a cop anyway."

[accalia]

"Neither did I, at first." Tony says walking to a cabinet and retrieving the hidden bottle of rum that Vic hadn't known was there. He pours two glasses and returns to the table.

[yamikuronue]

Vic looks up, tears still streaming down his cheeks. "Why did you do it?" he asks, quietly.

[accalia]

Tony drops one of the glasses on the table in front of Vic. "Well. Because i needed to get out of the... Well like The Family, but before they moved in here. Different group, same purpose. Father was in with them. That and I met a good man who took me under his wing and showed me that greatness isn't being on top of the pile, but in lifting someone else up above yourself."

Tony takes a sip of the rum, straight and without ice, the effect on his cheeks is immediate.

[yamikuronue]

Greatness isn't being at the top of the pile...?

"I don't want greatness. I just want everything to be okay."

[accalia]

"That's a kind of greatness too."

[yamikuronue]

"That's like, the opposite of greatness." He rubs at his eyes again. "I mean, it's being average. Comfortable. Keeping my head down. Being unexceptional."

[accalia]

"And that's bad?"